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One origin story for fuck is that it comes from when sex was outlawed unless it was permitted explicitly by the king, so people who were legally banging had Fornication Under Consent of the King on their doors, or: F. But obviously that's wrong. And if you do believe that, stop it.

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Following is the top-list of the best quotes on fake people and fake friends. People pretend well. At the end of the day, real situations expose fake people, so pay attention.

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Remember back in ye olde days when you would poke that cute friend of yours on Facebook? To those of us who have thirsted in the wastelands of dating apps, this should all sound very familiar. That ought to give it somewhat of an advantage over dating apps, as it opens up the opportunity to sneakily semi-flirt with people you meet in real life. Friending them on Facebook and not-so-innocently adding them to your Secret Crush list

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We met at a hotel room one night, just for fun. I wore lingerie, he tied me up, and I did coke off his boner before I blew him. I had sex with two Bangkok hookers, without a condom.

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A post I put a lot of effort in back then. It was pretty well-received. In fact, some are downright stupid.

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He has his moments, but you keep your distance from him. You still love him. This is how I lovingly describe my current relationship with the United States.

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Somewhere, a guy has a photo of me sitting topless in an office chair. Not just an office chair, in fact: the chair he sat at from nine til five, every day for over two years. My face, turned slightly away from the camera, is grinning with post-coital happiness. Perhaps all three.

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